Synesthesia & the Mystical Adult

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When I was a child, I would spend timeless days on my own deep in the woods behind our home. There was a stream that meandered through the back side of the land on which we lived that was a favorite daydreaming spot of mine.  It was not uncommon for me to lay down at the edge of the stream bed and dip my hands in the pools of water where the trickling creek would pause to find its way again before passing on by.

In the heat of the summer, I would scout out the spots that contained fresh frog eggs and languish in the sound of mother and father frogs singing to one another with wild and radical abandon.  The sound was vibrationally intoxicating and there was something otherworldly in the way each individual voice merged with the whole to produce an infinite symphony of primal wisdom that oozed with the promise of eternal Life.

In my mystical innocence, there was no fear for me in reaching below the dim water to feel around for that fertile squishy delight.  Once in my hands, the combination of slippery cool and juicy goodness was heavenly. Holding the frog eggs in my hands ever so delicately felt like holding God.  Peering into the creation process unfolding right in the palm of my hand was an Activation like no other, almost as if the infinite Universe opened up around my hands and I could see beyond the Seen as the flower of life expanded from one divinely connected frog egg to another.

A gigantic "YES" to life arose throughout my entire being.  Some call it levitation. I call it holographic suspension - you can taste the feeling of the sound you see.  You touch the Great Mystery and you are forever changed.

- Betsy Huljev | Content from the FORWARD of the book The Buddha With A Thousand Faces: A Sacred Portal for Coaches, Consultants and Online Marketers by Oliver Wade

This Holographic Suspension or SYNESTHESIA is a vital aspect of Clairvoyance that, when preserved & cultivated as a child, becomes a powerful, visceral & prosperous bridge between the worlds.

We all have the capacity to maintain this multidimensional “way of being” that was first experienced as we came into form withIN the womb & then later nurtured through childhood fantasy (which is very REAL).

In the womb, a developing human can taste the mother’s emotions, hear her visions & feel her thoughts (amongst many other combinations).

The senses intermingle in such a way that the Biological Brilliance of gestation unfolds withIN a Womb Conscious Environment where everything makes scents, vibration & texture.

The placenta is the Spiritual Organ through which all other Spiritual Organs of the developing child are nurtured & awakened, or not.

-Betsy Huljev

The Womb Environment is of the utmost importance because the quality of the gestational experience sets the child up to THRIVE as a 4 fold Human Being (physical, etheric, astral & spirit) or to merely SURVIVE solely as a physical body with dormant connections to the remaining TRINITY (astral, etheric & spirit).

Karma also plays a role in this picture. The Karma that I speak of is clearly defined by Rudolf Steiner & does not follow with popular culture understanding. Discover more HERE

Later, as a budding child & for the first 7 years of life, children are held in an external womb…the womb of Gaia…where they continue to incarnate into their physical bodies by being enwombed within their own Spiritual Senses which are supported by the elemental beings, nature, love, empathy, compassion & tenderness.

Children organically vibrate at a much slower rate, very much like plants, because they are deeply connected to the Astral realms in the early years (& perhaps for much longer).

This Astral & Spiritual connection strengthens the quality of the Etheric Body (the blood, nervous system & cellular structure) as the physical body continues to form (the physical body is not fully formed until the age of 28).

Unfortunately, many are not given the opportunity to FULLY experience the Mystery School & Initiation that is a properly held childhood.

Far too many adults suffer from what is known as ABANDONMENT wounds, which in the beginning stages of SELF-Development may feel very “blood” related (i.e. directly related to our blood relations), but as one digs deeper, this is a much bigger piece that streams directly into the core wound of SEPARATION from Source.

Often, one may “think” that they were abandoned by a physical parent, and perhaps they were, because this is a powerful aspect of karma that thankfully sets one up to FEEL very potently the insertion point of SEPARATION from Source in order to remedy the situation in THIS LIFETIME.

By the very nature of this contemplation one comes to know that they are stuck in a karmic loop, enslaved to a 1 dimensional/ 1 fold perspective on life, THE PHYSICAL plane.

This is not to say that the PHYSICAL plane is not important. It very much is. Our physical body is the avatar & holy vessel through which all else can flow.

THE GREAT WORK is to Liberate the Soul such that Divine Union of the 4 Fold Human Being can actually take place…a Sacred Marriage between body, blood, soul & spirit.

We come to this planet to experience eternity, because only in these physical bodies can we properly experience birth & death, which releases the TRINITY from & to Source…again & again…such that the Evolution of Humanity is made possible through this dance of immortality.

-Betsy Huljev

In the work that I do with those I serve, one of the first pieces that comes to the surface to resolve is Vast FORGIVENESS related to NOT experiencing a properly held childhood…to NOT receiving the space to nurture this connection to Source, but instead feeling “cut off” from the astral/etheric/spirit TRINITY too soon…cut off from the BELOVED.

There is much grief to be held here. Grief that asks to be taken very seriously in order to transmute it back to love through the “I” of the human being where it is transformed INto WISDOM.

WISDOM that births new perceptions & a more prosperous connection to INtuition, INstinct, INspiration & imagINation.

It is a very beautiful thing to GRIEVE properly. To allow the body to FEEL the sorrow of SEPARATION from Source, from the BELOVED.

Once this grief has been given its time to shine, the met sorrow illumINates a deeper truth…

In the case of FORGIVENESS regarding an unmet childhood, one comes to FEEL & KNOW that their physical parents were perfect portals back to Source…GRATITUDE flows & SYNESTHESIA begins to restore itself withIN…because a felt melody, woven by the parental imprints & sung by the BELOVED, begins to pulse through the etheric realms, through the blood, rebirthing the connection of Inner Sight.

This Inner Sight becomes a WOMB through which all aspects of the TOMB return to LOVE.

A true RECLAMATION of the Nervous System.

RESURRECTION at its finest.

It is a process. And one that asks for support. We are not meant to walk this path of LOVE alone.

Rudolf Steiner offers up a courageous practical tool in his book Reincarnation and Karma:

Such a definite conception can be acquired by means of certain inner exercises that are by no means easy; indeed they are difficult, but they can nevertheless be carried out.

The first step is in some degree to practice the normal kind of self-cognition which consists in looking back over one’s life and asking oneself:

What kind of person have I been?

Have I been a person with a strong inclination for reflection, for inner contemplation; or am I one who has always had more love for the sensations of the outer world, liking or disliking this or that in everyday life?

Was I a child who at school like reading but not arithmetic, one who liked to hit other children but did not like being hit?

Or was I a child always bound to be bullied and not smart enough to bully others?

It is well to look back on one’s life in this way, and especially to ask oneself: Was I cut out of activities of the mind or of the will?

What did I find easy or difficult?

What happened to me that I would like to have avoided?

What happenings make me say to myself: ‘I am glad this has come to pass’- and so on.

It is good to look back on one’s life in a certain way, and above all to envisage clearly those things that one did not like.

All this leads to a more intimate knowledge of the inner kernel of our being.

For example, a son who would have liked to become a poet was destined by his father to be a craftsman, and a craftsman he became, although he would sooner have been a poet.

It is well to know clearly what we really wanted to be, and what we have become against our will, to visualize what would have suited us in the time of our youth but was not our lot, and then, again, what we would have liked to avoid...

We must therefore be quite clear as to what such a retrospect into the past means; it tells us what we did not want, what we would have liked to avoid.

When we have made that clear to ourselves, we really have a picture of those things in our life which have pleased us least.

That is the essential point.

And we must now try to live into a very remarkable conception: we must desire and will everything that we have not desired or willed.

WE must imagINe to ourselves: What should I actually have become if I had ardently desired everything that in fact I did not wish for and which really went against the grain in life?

In a certain sense we must here rule out what we have succeeded in overcoming, for the most important thing is that we should ardently wish or picture ourselves wishing for the things we have not desired, or concerning which we have not been able to carry out our wishes, so that we create for ourselves, in FEELING and THOUGHT, a being hitherto unfamiliar to us.

We must picture ourselves as this being with great INtensity.

If we can do this, if we can identify ourselves with the being we have ourselves built up in this way, we have make some real progress toward becoming acquainted with the inner soul-kernel of our being; for in the picture we have thus been able to make of our own personality there will arise something that we have not been in this present incarnation but which we have introduced INto it.

Our deeper being will emerge from the picture built up in this way.

You will see, therefore, that from those who wish to gain knowledge of this inner kernel of being, something is required for which people in our age have no INclination at all.

They are not disposed to desire anything of the sort, for nowadays, if they reflect upon their own nature, they want to find themselves absolutely satisfied with it as it is...

If you call up the counterpart of yourself, the following thought will dawn upon you.

This counterpart- difficult as it may be to realize it as a picture of yourself in this life- is nevertheless connected with you, and you cannot disown it.

Once it appears, it will follow you, hover before your soul and crystalize in such a way that you will realize that it has something to do with you, but certainly not with your present life.

And then there develops the perception that this picture is derived from an earlier life.
— Rudolf Steiner | Reincarnation & Karma

This New Perception forms an Inner Environment ripe for Stretching out FULLY INto the 4 fold Human Being where one taps INto the Magical Inner Child & begins the process of birthing the Miraculous & Mystical Adult.

All of this WORK is done through the Vast Intelligence of a New Archetype available to each of us now: THE GREAT BIRTHER.

The GREAT BIRTHER holds the codes to Embodied Womb Consciousness & uses restored SYNESTHESIA as a practical tool for rebirthing the 4 fold Human Being.

-Betsy Huljev

Holographic Remembrance Portrait by  Betsy Huljev

Holographic Remembrance Portrait by Betsy Huljev

My Sacred Work is devoted to the Awakening of THE GREAT BIRTHER withIN & the unfoldment of the 4 Fold Human Being.

Simply put, I help you FULLY Incarnate & do what you came here to do.

One of the ways that you can begin this process of Re-INvisioning the Divine & Majestic Being withIN that Rudolf Steiner speaks of is through the HOLOGRAPHIC REMEMBRANCE PORTRAITS that I have the honor of creating.

The process described above is brought to life through Holographic Digital Imagery that serves to OPEN & SOFTEN your being INto Vast REMEMBRANCE of Who you are & why you have come to the planet at this time.

The imagery that manifests through this TRANSFORMATIONAL PROCESS kindles the Inner Sense of WARMTH, encourages the WILL to do what it does best, imbues the SOUL LIFE with deep meaning & illuminates the Golden Path of GOD withIN.

Illuminate the Vast Spiritual Essence pouring through you & Activate the SHAPE-SHIFTER withIN who knows how to bend time & space. Expand the boundaries of Beauty INto the abyss of Exquisitely Pristine Luscious Enchantment. Enliven something NEW withIN you & withIN ALL of Humanity…

Only he has an inner right to speak of evolution in the domain of outer nature who acknowledges this evolution also in the sphere of soul and spirit.

Now, it is clear that this acknowledgment, this extension of knowledge of nature beyond nature is more than mere cognition.

For it transforms cognition into life; it does not merely enrich man’s knowledge, it provides him with the strength for his life’s journey.

It shows him whence he comes and whither he goes. And it will show him this whence and whither beyond birth and death if he steadfastly follows the direction which this knowledge indicates.

He knows that everything he does is a link in the stream which flows from eternity to eternity.

The point of view from which he regulates his life becomes higher and higher.

The man who has not attained to this state of mind appears as though enveloped in a dense fog, for he has no idea of his true being, of his origin and goal.

He follows the impulses of his nature, without any insight into these impulses.

He must confess that he might follow quite different impulses, were he to illuminate his path with the light of knowledge. Under the influence of such an attitude of soul, the sense of responsibility in regard to life grows constantly.

If the human being does not develop this sense of responsibility in himself, he denies, in a higher sense, his humanness.

Knowledge lacking the aim to ennoble the human being is merely the satisfying of a higher curiosity.

To raise knowledge to the comprehension of the spiritual, in order that it may become the strength of the whole life, is, in a higher sense, duty.

Thus it is the duty of every human being to seek the understanding for the Whence and Whither of the Soul.
— Rudolf Steiner | Reincarnation & Karma

It is my pleasure to hold space for the unfoldment of this process for those I serve.


I AM, as Rumi wrote:

One who brings the JOY of being opened.

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